Khouf by Antony Fangary

never forget your mother woke you that morning / you ran to the tv / she said explosions / a
tower collapsing into itself / a structure of sand / aware where you stood / how flags can flash
like hammers / fabric and colors can beg / never forget learning you were arab / the first time
letters collapsed onto you like soil / never forget hating yourself / your food / music / name
/what burnt / knuckle / hair smelt like / your mother dyed her hair blonde / plucked your eye
brows into slivers / never forget the wet wrinkle of her scream when the second tower fell / that
it meant something was to come / your parents changed their names / airplanes /random security
checks / being accused of trying to start a caliphate / learning the word caliphate / the photo of
pope shenouda / the trigger pull that followed /never forget learning about afghanistan / iraq /
saudi arabia / iran / palistine / how you / your persian friend / your afghan friend started a
tagging crew called arabs with attitude / though none of you were arab / white kids wanted to
join / you told them they had to get jumped/in / how easily abdomens give in to driving knees
/how pink white flesh can flush / when they first said never forget and how bad you wished they
would /when your friend/s dad said they need to just nuke all the fuckin arabs /how stiff his jaw
looked /the terror in your father/s eyes when he saw you wearing a shirt that said diamond in
arabic / how he calls you every time there is a mass/shooter /how he begs you to shave your face
/ how 14 people were killed near your house in san bernardino / he begs you to shave your face /
never forget when your father told you that we deserve this / we changed the way the world
travels / no other people have done this before / we have nothing to be proud of